Tuesday, February 26, 2013

Helicopter Mama

I never thought I was a helicopter mama until I read this post on E, Myself and I. I mean I make fun of those mamas! We have a sign about Helicopter parenting on the front door of our school...especially for those parents that seem to think they need to walk their kid in everyday after the first couple weeks of school, put their kid's bags away and hover.

However when thinking about it I do kind of hover. Isaac has a cell phone but it's closely monitored and he can't receive any picture messages. I don't know about ya'll but all that talk about 'sexting' has me a little petrified. We have our internet locked down and our TV has parental codes for anything over PG 13. We stay involved in all his school events (he made A honor roll again!) and never miss an opportunity for  a parent conference. He gets to go to friends' houses but only people we know VERY well. Josh and I have even had to turn him down in front of a parent that asked if he could come over. There are just too many weirdos out there.

So I am protective, I want to know all that's going on. We have talks about all sorts of stuff; even the hard stuff. I definitely think a parent can be over protective and Josh and I both try to give him trust and freedom that he has earned. He is very responsible and has been that way from early on. I would have no issues leaving him home alone for an hour or so now that  he is 12 years old because he isn't like me! When I was 12, my mom came home from work and I was at the end of our driveway burying a time capsule with only a tee-shirt and undies on. She also came home to me on top of the roof on a couple occasions. Isaac would never do that...but I can already tell you Eli might be a different story. I'll let you know in 10 years.

Every decent parent wants what is best for their kid and each person has their own thoughts about what that is. People want to think it's all about school.. whether it's public, private, or homeschooling. I just don't think that's the answer. Each kid is an individual, has different needs and one way is not necessarily the 'right' way.  I went to a private school from 3rd grade to 9th grade and it was a great experience. Isaac has been in public school since pre-K and so far it has been a great experience. Even when I had to drive out of district I felt that consistency was important. He stayed at the same elementary school from PK to 6th grade. I loved teaching at his school because he could come to my classroom in the mornings and afternoons, I could say 'hey' at lunch time and I was there if he needed me. So we are going to keep on our course of public schooling while it is working. Hey, don't change it if it's not broke! Not to say that we won't ever think about other options.

 I try not to hover too much because my job is to teach him to be an independent and functional member of society without me. I've never been big on fixing their plate after they can do it (how are they going to learn how to serve themselves), or doing their homework ( I won't be there for the tests).  When Isaac was small we sat down did homework together, then as he got older I would check his assignment notebook, and now he's at the point where I don't have to ask if he has homework because I know he will get it done. It's a good feeling knowing that he is responsible enough to get it done, because one day he's going to be in college and won't have his mama asking him if he finished his work. In the mornings, he wakes up to his alarm, gets ready, and is ready to go to school before we are ready to take him. I do wish some of his 'responsibleness' would carryover to hygiene. He still needs reminders about showers and teeth brushing.

Eli needs a little more hovering right now. He still needs his heiny wiped, even though he is getting pretty good at doing it himself.  But one day he too will spread his wings and it's my job to make sure he can fly.



I like this quote, "An infallible way to make your child miserable is to satisfy all his demands." Henry Home




Even Livi gets to learn how to self feed 

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